Most people are surprised to learn that the majority of dog bites happen from dogs people know — not stray dogs. In fact, studies show about 77% of dog bite victims are bitten by a familiar dog, often their own family dog, a friend’s dog, or a neighbor’s dog.

The good news is that many dog bites are preventable when children and adults learn how to better understand canine body language, boundaries, and safe interactions.

Want a simple dog safety guide you can keep and share?

I created a free Feeling Safe Around Dogs guide with practical tips to help children, adults, and families better understand dogs, respect boundaries, and feel safer around them.

Download the guide here.

As a Humane Educator for over 30 years, I teach kindness, compassion, and respect for all living beings, including animals, people, and the environment. My work includes helping children and adults better understand animal behavior, responsible pet guardianship, and safety around animals.

Part of my work included teaching dog bite prevention programs in classrooms throughout the San Francisco Bay Area. I saw firsthand how important it is for both children and adults to understand dogs’ behavior and body language so everyone can stay safe around them.

Julie, my Animal Communication client and life-long dog lover, recently emailed me to thank me for my advice for staying safe around her relatives’ dogs. 

“I took your advice and have been very careful around my husband’s relatives’ dogs, who tend to be unruly and out of control when people arrive. I won’t enter my in-laws’ house unless their Labradoodle, Jagger, is on a leash or behind a fence because my poor little nephew went inside, and the dog jumped on him, slamming his head against the wall.

I’m the same way with my niece’s rescue terrier mix, Buddy, who has bitten two more people since we last spoke, one bite quite severe. One time, my niece came outside to find me sitting on her front steps. She asked why. I told her I didn’t know where her dog was, and I wasn’t willing to take the chance.”

Julie is not alone. I hear stories like hers all the time from family members and dog professionals, too.

The Pressure to be “Polite”

My groomer told me today that she was bit twice by an elderly dog when she took her off the grooming table. The dog’s owner had alluded she was reactive but not in a clear way. My groomer felt distraught and bad that she didn’t want to groom the dog anymore.

I encouraged her to put her safety first. She felt relieved when I said this.

Whether you’re like Julie visiting relatives or simply out for a walk, the pressure to be “polite” often overrides staying safe.

Fear of Dogs Is More Common Than You Think

Fear of dogs is more common in children. While not everyone has a true dog phobia, many people feel unsure or unsafe around dogs. That’s why learning how to stay safe and read a dog’s behavior is so important.

From reasonable caution around a dog you don’t trust, like Julie, to fear so overwhelming it affects daily life, fear looks different for everyone. 

When we treat children’s fear of dogs as no big deal or something to push through, we create an unsafe situation for the child and the dog.

What the Dog Is Actually Telling You

When a dog jumps on a guest or bites someone, they are communicating, telling you exactly how they feel.

A large dog like Jagger, who jumps and lunges when guests arrive, is often overwhelmed with excitement, but most likely hasn’t been shown a calm way to greet guests. He just doesn’t know a different way. At a certain size and force, the consequences can be serious.

A dog like Buddy, who has bitten more than once, has learned something: the bite works. It creates distance.

His people know he is fearful, yet continue to put him in situations where biting feels like his only way out. He is not asking to be feared. He is asking for space, and without intervention, his life is at risk.

Keeping everyone safe, including the dog, means setting them up for success in situations that may feel overwhelming or scary.

What We Teach Children Without Realizing It

My dog Yogi Bear and I were at a dog park recently when we came across a little girl with her family and a couple of Labradoodles. One of the dogs had cornered her against a fence, and she began to cry. The adults around her were quick to minimize her reaction: “he didn’t mean any harm,” “You shouldn’t be afraid.”

But the dog’s intentions were beside the point. What this little girl needed was to feel safe and have her feelings validated, not dismissed. The message she received instead was: “Your fear is wrong. The dog matters more than your feelings.”

We teach children to override their instincts when we do this. And those instincts exist for a reason: to protect us. When a child or an adult feels hesitant or fearful around a dog, their body is picking up on important signals, whether it’s the dog’s size, intense energy, or a lack of predictable boundaries.

These “gut feelings” are essential survival tools designed to keep us out of harm’s way.

You don’t need to apologize for keeping yourself or your child safe around dogs.

 It’s okay to call ahead and ask that the dog be leashed or put in another room before you arrive. It’s okay to wait outside.

It’s okay to leave.

Your safety and your child’s come first. 

Help your family feel safer and more confident around dogs.

Download my free Feeling Safe Around Dogs guide to learn practical ways to better understand dogs, respect their boundaries, and create safer interactions for both people and dogs.

if you found this helpful, please leave a comment below. We’d love to hear about your experiences.

The post Staying Safe Around Dogs appeared first on Cathy Malkin -- Animal Muse Communication and Reiki.

Your dog chews the couch while you’re out. You come home to stuffing scattered like fresh snow.

Your cat pees on your bed. An unexpected smell greets you, and frustration builds when you see the wet spot.

Your once-easygoing pet is growling at your child’s friends, leaving you worried for everyone’s safety.

It’s easy to label this as bad behavior. But what looks like a problem to us is actually communication from them. Our pets are family members, and like any family member, they deserve to be heard and understood.

Animals don’t misbehave to be difficult or spiteful. When something changes in their behavior, it’s because something has changed inside or around them. They’re trying to tell you something.

Behavior Is a Language

Think of your pet’s behavior as a conversation. Each action communicates their feelings: fear, discomfort, stress, or an unmet need.

When behaviors escalate to “misbehaving”—destructive chewing, biting, aggression or house soiling—it’s often their last resort because their quieter signals weren’t received.

Common “Problem Behaviors” and What They Mean

• Chewing, scratching, or destroying things often signals stress, anxiety, or pent-up energy—your pet trying to release tension.
• Excessive barking or vocalizing can indicate fear, frustration, or loneliness—a way of saying, “Something doesn’t feel right.”
• House soiling or litter box changes are usually linked to stress, routine changes, or physical discomfort—rarely defiance.
• Clinginess or withdrawal both signal insecurity or feeling unwell. Whether your pet won’t leave your side or hides under the bed, both are communication.
• Aggression or reactivity is most often fear-based. A growl or snap is an early warning saying, “I don’t feel safe.” If warnings aren’t heeded, a bite is the next step.

What Changed?

Important: Always consult your veterinarian first. Sudden behavior changes can signal medical issues like UTIs, pain, or illness.

Once medical causes are ruled out, ask yourself:

• Has their routine changed?
• Has there been stress in the household?
• Has something changed like the loss of a pet or a child going off to college?

Our pets are extremely sensitive to their environment and to our emotional state. As family members living in our homes, they experience everything we do. When we’re anxious or stretched thin, they feel it too.

Why Punishment Doesn’t Address the Issue

Punishment tends to suppress an unwanted behavior temporarily, but it doesn’t address the root cause. If your pet is scared, in pain, or overwhelmed, punishment only adds stress—making it harder for them to communicate clearly.

When you take time to understand what your pet is trying to tell you—whether through observation, professional help, or animal communication—you create safety. And when your pet feels safe and understood, the need to “act out” often disappears.

Your pet knows why they’re acting this way. The key is recognizing and understanding their perspective.

Get Answers Directly from Your Pet

Once you’ve ruled out medical causes, an animal communication session can be a game changer. It gives your pet a voice so you can get answers to your questions directly from them. When you understand the reasons behind their unwanted behaviors, you can work in partnership with your pet to resolve them.

Most animals know exactly what’s driving their behavior. Through animal communication, you can ask them directly: What changed? What do they need? How are they experiencing the household?

When your pet tells you they’re peeing on the bed because they’re stressed about the new dog or baby, or that they’re chewing the couch because they feel abandoned when you leave—you finally know what to address. Once that root cause is addressed, the behavior often resolves naturally.

When you ask your pet what’s going on, two things happen: You get real answers, and they feel truly heard. That act of listening—of respecting their viewpoint—often shifts the dynamic immediately.

When pets feel heard, their nervous systems soften. When we feel informed, our worry eases. When you involve your pet in the solution, they tend to be more than willing to stop misbehaving.

If your pet’s behavior has you puzzled or concerned, I invite you to schedule an Animal Communication session.

Together, we can ask your pet your questions and receive answers directly from them so you can find solutions to their unwanted behavior.

Got questions? Email: cathy@animalmuse.com

If this resonated, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to like, share, and leave a comment as your experience may help someone else feel less alone.

The post Why Is My Pet Misbehaving? appeared first on Cathy Malkin -- Animal Muse Communication and Reiki.

If your dog growls, barks, or charges at guests—even those they’ve met before—it’s more than stressful—it’s exhausting.

And it can quickly escalate into a dangerous situation.

You’re not alone if you feel frustration, stress, and self-doubt. Even guilt.

Many devoted dog parents try everything—trainers, tools, techniques—yet still struggle to uncover what’s really going on beneath their dog’s unwanted behavior.

As an Animal Communicator and pet anxiety expert, I’ve supported hundreds of families through this exact challenge.

An Animal Communication session gives your dog a chance to share their perspective of why they are acting out, and what they feel they need to feel safe, supported, and at ease.

Once you understand the root cause of your dog’s behavior, you can work together to find solutions that are sustainable.

Meet Eleanor: A Gentle Giant on High Alert

Recently, I spoke with Eleanor, a 6-year-old English Mastiff, and her devoted person, Laura, about precisely this.

Eleanor is deeply loved. She’s been an integral part of Laura’s family since she was a pup and adores the four children she lives with.

But when people come to the door—including visitors she’s met before—Eleanor’s behavior becomes unpredictable, intense, potentially dangerous, and, at times, very scary.

She growls, blocks the path with her enormous body, and even charges at anyone who tries to enter the house.

The potential of someone getting hurt is real, and thankfully, Laura recognizes she must find a way to help Eleanor stop her aggressive behavior for everyone’s safety. 

To Laura’s credit, she has worked with multiple trainers and tried many techniques.

Out of desperation and on the recommendation of a police dog trainer, Laura tried using a shock collar as a last resort. She resisted at first—’It just doesn’t feel right,’ she told me—and her instinct was correct.

While it seemed to stop the immediate behavior, it didn’t address what Eleanor was actually feeling underneath.

She tried it because she thought it was the only thing that helped Eleanor understand that it was ok to let visitors in.

What Eleanor Shared

During our session, Eleanor showed me she was overwhelmed and anxious.

She expressed that being a guard dog in a busy, active family of six was a lot, even though she was trying her best.

But that constant state of vigilance had become exhausting and stressful for her—and for Laura.

She didn’t always feel this way.

The past 5 years brought tremendous change to Eleanor’s life.

First, the pandemic hit, and Laura was pregnant. Then Eleanor went through a life-threatening illness that changed her.

To top it off, the family moved from California to the East Coast.

These experiences left Eleanor feeling unsure and unsettled in her new home.

A Guard Dog Under Pressure

Eleanor expressed that Laura told her that it was her job to protect the entire household 24/7 and that she takes her job very seriously.

It seems Eleanor missed the memo about letting visitors in.

In her mind, anyone outside the immediate family was suspicious until proven otherwise, even if she had met that person before.

Laura hadn’t realized that asking Eleanor to be “on guard” all the time created a level of pressure Eleanor simply couldn’t handle.

Eleanor — You’re Fired (With Love)!

This was a turning point in Eleanor’s session.

I suggested that Eleanor be fired from her guard dog duties in the house

Not in anger. But with kindness, relief, and yes, even a little humor.

Laura thanked Eleanor for protecting her family and told her, out loud: “Thank you for protecting us. You’ve done an amazing job. But you’re fired. You don’t need to protect the house 24/7. I’ve got it now.”

As Laura shared these heartfelt words, Eleanor’s body softened, her breathing relaxed, and you could almost feel the tension leave her.

Dogs often need permission from their person to stop doing a job they were asked to do, especially if they’re not good at it and can potentially cause harm.

Creating Safety Without Pressure

We also discussed the importance of creating a sense of safety for Eleanor and the children.

I encouraged Laura to consider using a crate—not as punishment but as a cozy den where Eleanor could retreat and relax, especially when the house gets busy with visitors and kids.

The goal wasn’t to isolate her, but to give her a break from the overwhelming energy she thought she had to protect against.

With Eleanor safely in her crate, Laura can also relax and stop worrying and stressing out about keeping everyone safe.

Going forward, I suggested that Laura:

• Use gates at doorways to protect visitors.

• Support Eleanor with Reiki to ease emotional tension and find balance.

• Educate her children and friends on how to be safe around dogs, like avoiding eye contact and turning away.

• Encouraging Laura to lead Eleanor with grounded energy because Eleanor feels safer when Laura is a confident dog handler.

Why This Matters

When your dog is reactive or overprotective, it doesn’t just affect visitors and their safety—it can affect your whole family and life.

Your dog’s reaction to guests can lead to isolation, stress, guilt, and a breakdown in trust.

And underneath it all, your dog isn’t trying to be difficult—they’re trying to cope the best they can.

Animal Communication can help you determine the root cause of your dog’s anxiety, reactive behavior, or overprotective behavior.

You don’t have to figure it out alone, nor does your dog.

The Lesson

This session was a beautiful reminder that animals don’t need to be “fixed”—they need to be heard, supported, and understood so they can feel safe.

And healing begins.

Before You Go

If your animal is showing signs of stress, reactivity, or overwhelm, consider this:
They’re trying to tell you something.

Schedule Your Animal Communication Session today and begin the journey back to peace~together.

*Originally published May 15, 2025*

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